22 October 2009

BNB Rule #22 Vice Cream

Life is not worth living unless you allow yourself a few vices...like coffee and cigarettes; martinis and chocolate; tabloids and ice cream. 

15 October 2009

BNB Rule #21 La-Z-Life

Just because it's comfortable and it conforms to your ass does not mean you have to buy it.  Never settle for anything less than what you deserve.

BNB Rule #20 The F Words

Forgive & Forget?   It takes a strong person to forgive, but an even stronger person to forget; it takes a barenaked bitch to do both.

BNB Rule #19 Life is Pain

If it doesn't hurt, it's probably not worth it.  Every barenaked bitch has to endure pain to get through life.  It's just a fact.

13 October 2009

BNB Rule #18 Simple Life

Life is beautiful and extravagant just the way it is, and so are you.  You don't need anything extra to be extraordinary.  Be yourself. Be simple.

12 October 2009

BNB Rule #17 A New Golden Rule

If you can't say anything nice, screw it.  Say it anyway.  Everyone has a right to say what they feel, when they feel it, even you.  So grant other people the same thing. If you don't like it, take it with a grain of salt, and move on.

09 October 2009

BNB Rule #16 Classy Costumes

Just because you're a barenaked bitch does not mean you're a whore...as Halloween draws near, it's time to pick out your costume, head to the nearest party or club, and enjoy the one night of the year where you can be anyone you want to be...except for a whore.  You're better and more creative than a slutty nurse or a Girl Next Door costume.

This year, pick out a classy costume, such as Michelle Obama, a superhero, a vampire queen, or as a character from Harry Potter or Twilight...whatever you do, avoid costumes with the words "bunny", "nurse", "schoolgirl", "secretary", etc...basically, avoid anything that would make you a pervert's target.

08 October 2009

BNB Rule #15 STD (Stop The Diseases)

If every barenaked bitch follows this rule, she can stop the spread of disease:
Cold sore on lips; keep heads above hips. Or, for some, cold sore below hips, keep heads above hips.